ANNIKA MY NORSE GIRL FRIEND
by Hamlet



It was a lovely day as I worked in the bar of the Clarendon Hotel in Deal. I
could see the French coast in the distance as I saw the lights of Boulogne. I
was standing there thinking about the Norse Girls whom I had seen earlier on
in the day while I was laying the tables in the hotel.

Suddenly I could hear Michael the bar manager shout at me. I was beginning to
feel he was a real pain .He was an ex paratrooper and he could not adjust to
civilian life treating all staff as if they were in the army.

'Stephen will you clean the glasses and serve these customers over here. And
will you stop interrupting me!'

He had this fixation that I was always interrupting him even thiugh I had
never said a word. I was seriously beginnng to doubt his sanity.

Suddenly I looked across the bar and the four Norse Children had walked in At
the from I could see Annika wither friend Kristina. Behind them were two Norse
Boys whose name s I found out were Hans and Jarre.In many ways the boys were
indistinguishable from the Girls as there are in many ways just as beautiful
with their blonde hair and bronzed complexions. The only differences I could
see was that the Girls' bulges were in their fronts whereas all the boys had
huge bulges between their legs protruding from their tight leather shorts
.Even though I am not homosexual I was gazing in admiration at the Boys' huge
members and muscles and I could understand why women in their thousands were
joining the NAS (Norselandic Admiration Society)..

I could hear them talking to each other in Norselandic laughing in at the same
time.

'Oh se over det Kristina det som soot waiter vi saa tidligere i dag!'

'Oh look over there Kristina there's that sweet waiter we saw earlier on
today!

'Oh wonderful I'm going to go straight over and order two shandies!'.

Oh vidunderlige kommer jeg til aa gaa rett over og bestille to shandies!

'Also I'm going to ask him to go with me to an Indian restaurant! I'm starving
and I want to try a curry!'

Ogsaa kommer jeg til aa be ham aa gaa med meg til en indisk restaurant! Jeg
sulter og jeg vil proove en karri!

'Be careful Annika remember what Ms Toughaard told us about associating with
oslanders!'

V�r forsiktig Annika husk hva Ms Toughaard fortalte oss om knytte med
oslanders!

'Remember She told us they are really subhumans!!;

Husk at hun fortalte oss at de virkelig undermaanniskor!!

'Don't worry Kristina I'm just going to ask him to go out to a restaurant with
me. We won't have sex yet!'

Ikke bekymre deg Kristina Jeg er bare goig aa be ham aa ga ut til en
restaurang med meg.Vi har ikke sex ennaa!

'Just be careful Annika you don't want an oslander penis to pollute your
vagina!'

Bare v�r forsiktig Annika du ikke oonsker en oslander penis til aa forurense
din slidan!

She walked over to me looking so calm and confident

'Hello could I have 2 shandies!'

'Yes certainly that will be £2'.

'Oh that cheap that's only NM 40 in my currency!'

'Oh what country do you come from?'

Why don't you guess sweetheart?

'Er Sweden

'No miles way I'm Norselandic!'

That is mile away! The other side of the world!'

I't's a lovely country the best in the world .You should go there one day .by
the way my name is Annika lovely to meet you darling'

Suddenly Michael shouted at me.

'Will you hurry up and serve that bloody foreign bird there are glasses to be
cleaned And will you stop interrupting me!'

'OK Michael I won't long'

'Why does that arsehole tell you to stop interrupting you when you haven't
said a word?'

I could hear Kristina call to her

'Please Annika bring the drinks over and can you bring us three bags of crisps
!'

Vennligst annika fore drikke over og kan du gi oss tre poser med potetgull !

'I'm just coming over I just want to ask him to go out with me. Also I want to
deal with that arsehole who keeps bossing him around! He's getting on my
nerves!'

Jeg er bare kommer over Jeg vil bare be ham aa gaa ut med meg.jeg ogsaa vil
han dtere som roovhaal som holder relief ham rundt! Han faar paa nervene mine!

She shouted across the bar not caring how much noise she made so glad She was
free in England from all the restrictions she faced in Norseland.

She then walked right up to me Her tall body towering over mine.

'What's your name sweetie?

'Er Stephen'

Lovely to meet you darling I would like you to go out with me now .I'd love to
go to an Indian restaurant and try curry as we hardly have any foreign
restaurants in my Nation.Do you know of an Indian restaurant near here?

'Well there's the Milaad tandoori in Middle Street which is a Bangladeshi
restaurant.'

I don't know much about Bangladeshi food but I would love to try it!

'Well er the trouble is that I don't have much money on me er Annika'

'Don't worry I will pay. Women in My Nation always pay for men and you won't
have to pay a penny for anything while you're with me!'

'I' d love to go Annika but I don't finish until 11.'

Don't worry I'll tell that idiot of a boss you're finishing now!

I'm just going over to my friends with these drinks.I will then tell that
bastard of a boss you're finishing now!'

She walked over to Her three school friends

'We're going to a Bangladeshi restaurant. I won't be back at the hotel before
midnight. Also I want to tell that moron over there to let Stephen go early or
he'll feel my boot in his groin!'

Vi kommer til Bangladesh ligger restaurang. Jeg vil ikke v�re tilbake paa
hotellet foor midnatt.Ogsaa vil jeg si at idiot over det aa la Stephen gaa
tidlig eller han vil foole min boot i hans skrittet!'

Kristina yelled out to Her as She walked towards me.

BE CAREFUL ANNIKA AND INSPECT THE KITCHENS BEFORE YOU EAT!!

'V��R FORSIKTIG ANNIKA OG KONTROLLER KJOOKKEN FOOR DU SPISER!!'

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