My Story Part 63 Corbin ********** "Guarding yourself >>From the love of another Left you with nothing tonight Why does it sound like The devil is laughing Leaving me haunted tonight" -Disturbed ********** I should have been born in ancient Roman times so I could kick ass in the Coliseum. What drives me to think like that? Well, I've been watching the series 'Rome' on HBO, it's one of the very few shows I watch faithfully. So between the hours of 9:00 and 10:00pm every Sunday I do not answer the phone or do anything but watch my show. Call me crazy because I don't see any women fighting or were there? But women do play a pivotal role in many of the scenes and from I have read this show tries to be historically accurate. Anyway, it was such a bloodthirsty, lustful era that I can easily picture myself fighting, loving and living life to the fullest. Yes I know times were also brutal and harsh, sometimes I think I was born in the wrong century. Anyway, time travel doesn't exist so I wonder about trying to put my imagination down into the form of some story. With 'yours truly' as a main character of course, but I wouldn't know where to start or how to write something like that. Should I give it a try? We'll see. I don't know, I keep thinking that if I ever tried my hand at writing some kind of story it would either turn out wonderful, or really stupid. ********** I'm driving into work two weeks ago and pull up to this stop sign, I'm just sitting there for a few seconds when I happen to look up into the rear view mirror and notice this green pickup truck coming up behind me. 'Hmmm, that truck is coming up mighty fast.' Is my first thought... 'Oh shit' is my next thought and then BAM!!! The fucker rear-ends me! The back of my head whacks the headrest, shit it happened so fast. So I turn off the car, my heart is hammering fast and for some reason I want to kick his ass. What an oblivious idiot, how does anyone run into the back of a vehicle sitting still! The guy gets out of his truck but I'm already looking at the back of my car...my whole back bumper is cracked, AHH MAN!! THIS SUCKS!! "You okay? You okay?" He kept asking while I'm kneeling down inspecting my poor bumper. His words haven't even registered yet as all I could think was that Sharon is going to kill me. (Why am I thinking that? Because this used to be her car, she gave it to me as a Christmas present last year. It's a 2003 Nighthawk Black Acura 2 door coupe, she loved this car, although I'm not crazy about black but it will do. But when her parents bought her a new sporty BMW *gag me with a shovel* she gave me this car. I was happy with my Honda Civic, a car I've had since my high school days but she insisted that I accept her present, but the moment of true shock came when I went out on Autotrader.com to look up the value, I'm still floored by this act of generosity on her part.) So the police show up after a quick cell call and the whole process was pretty painless. I dropped my car off at the body shop, got a ride over to the rental car place and now I'm driving this 2005 Nissan, you would think it would be super nice right? Well let me say this, Nissan sucks! This rickety bucket of bolts rattles, squeaks and is just a plain piece of crap! 'Was that a pot hole I just ran over? No it wasn't, this car just drives like a heap of crap. Later that day after the accident my neck was kind of sore and I got worried that something more serious was wrong, so I just went home early from work and took a nap. When I woke up the soreness was gone, thank goodness, it freaked me out for a few hours that day. Moving on... Thank god! This past Saturday morning was our final Soccer game and wouldn't you know it those little stinkers finally pulled it all together and played the best game they have ever played. We played against the first team from back in the beginning of the season, they beat us pretty solid the first go around, this time we spanked their butts. So obviously I was such a great Coach that I brought them along to another level of playing, while the other teams remained stagnate in their skills. :) I now have my Saturday mornings back again. ********** Now, I need to speak on something very important!! VERY-VERY-IMPORTANT!! *My Man* made the cover of People Magazine! "Sexiest Man Alive 2005" is Matthew McConaughey! Hot damn, I'm going out and buying four of those damn magazines! (You know what? My spell checker keeps putting a red line under McConaughey, what the fuck? Doesn't it know who he is!! Piece of CRAP SOFTWARE!! Insulting my man like that.) That's right, I said he is MY MAN, true we've never met BUT if we did he would dump that dog of girlfriend Pineapple Cruz. I don't know why he is torturing me by dating bony, ugly women like that, he's just messing with me, that's it. (Addendum, he in fact did dump that ugly wench and must now be seeking me out:) But I know his plan, he's saving the best for last (that would be me you boneheads!) He'll beg me to marry him and I'll consider it for a little while, but ultimately I will have to break his heart and decline because I am already involved. However, I could keep him around the house and pull him out as a conversation 'piece' when I have social get-togethers. Hmmm...must get to work on that... ...Can't you people see what important work I have to fill my hours! Gheesh. ********** "So where have YOU been? You two love birds pull an all-nighter?" Vera teased as I came strolling into the kitchen later that morning. "Vera!" I quickly turned away to hide my blushing cheeks, "Stop it! We just spent some time out on the beach and stuff...you know..." I couldn't even look up, still uncomfortable talking openly about my relationship with Sharon. "So, how does it feel to be 'Out of the closet'?" Vera pulled me aside and boldly asked. I think I tensed and cringed a bit, but found the courage to let myself relax as my left hand came up and brushed several strands of hair over my left ear. Giving a firm smile and a light shrug of my shoulders, "I still feel the same." Gathering my gym bag I let Sharon know I was heading across the street to a clubhouse that Sharon's parents where a member of, I wanted to get as many workouts as possible in, even while on vacation. Heading out into the early mid morning sun, I had to admit that I did feel different, the whole world felt different now, I fought off the waves of insecurity as everyone I passed on the sidewalk didn't just look at me, they almost stared deep into my soul as if my soul was now an open book. I kept thinking about a phrase I had once heard, 'Taking great risks in life...and the potential for great rewards' I couldn't recall the exact way it went, but it scared me to think I could love anyone as intensely as Sharon and to have my love returned back with the same intensity, it made my knees weak and my heart pound in my chest. And then I thought of Nikki and something even deeper stirred, then that dark ominous cloud which I now think of as a friend...a guiding force even, seemed to form, but that is for another time. I had caught myself smiling openly as I walked now, a couple of guys would stop and turn as if I was smiling at them...maybe flirting...but I just kept on walking, my face upturned towards the sun for a brief second, my eyes closing to feel the warmth of the rays as I thought back to last night and suddenly a chill swarmed over my body causing my mind, body and spirit to feel alive, sexually alive no less. I signed in at the front desk and observed that there was a pool and Jacuzzi, hmm...might have to take a dip after the workout. So I trudged up the stairs to the second level, which revealed a modest workout facility, a few free weights, your standard treadmills and elliptical machines. But most importantly I had the whole place to myself and with that I breathed a sigh of relief. First thing I did was to turn off the A/C and open all the windows. It was wonderful, with the sound of the ocean only a few yards away and a nice breeze blowing thru the room now. Seeing that I was alone, I sort of spread my stuff out as I stretched out on the floor. I first decided to start with some free weights normally I don't start with something heavy, but as I said I felt totally energized and psyched from the previous night with Sharon. But wait, the largest they have is 55? What the hell? What a slack establishment! I *was* looking for the 70lb weights, oh well better then nothing I guess. So I pull a couple off the rack and sit down on the bench to begin my chest/bench press. I did a set of eight, then put the weights down so as to sit up and stretch. With my back to the window I felt a nice breeze hit me in the back and I took a deep breath before laying back down and continuing with my next set. My concentration was almost broken by the noise of several people down in the lobby, this building has a terrible echo to it. But I just kept staring at the rotating ceiling fan overhead as I tried to block out the noise which was not an easy thing to do since the commotion was now getting louder. 'Shit!' I mumbled when I realized this group was now coming up the stairs and my time alone was about to come to an end. Quickly I put the weights down and pulled my gym bag close, fumbling thru the pockets to find my iPod and earphones...WHEW...I clip it onto my waist and press *play* just as the group walks in. I don't look up, not even giving the slightest acknowledgment, you see my plan is to keep focused on my workout, so I pull the weights up and lay back down to proceed with my next set. From the farthest scope of my peripheral vision I tried to see who these people were, there seemed to be about four or five of them, no big deal I just narrowed my eyelids and finished the current set of eight. I was back up to a sitting position and even with the earphones in I could tell their loud discussion from earlier in the lobby had changed in tone and probably content. This is of course indicative of the dynamics between men and women when the presence of the opposite sex is around. That observation goes for me as well, evident in the way my thoughts and physical posture changed, after all, even while I was involved with Sharon and Nikki, I have a strong attraction to men, a very strong attraction. Well I'm lost in thought as I try to ease drop on what the guys are doing. I sense some lingering looks my way, some are now actually exercising while I sit on my bench and pick at the calluses on my palm (attractive huh?). But I need to get back into my workout letting the music try and take me somewhere else as I contemplate the next exercise. I did glance to the right once and realized that this was the same group of guys that Sharon and I had waved at from the balcony on the first day here, well at least they looked similar. 'Shit!' I was suddenly startled by a faint tap on my right shoulder and my head jerked to the right and up. His mouth is moving with a smile, but I can't hear what he's saying as my left hand fumbles a bit to get the earphones out. "What?" I said in what surely had a tone of impatience. "You're from the balcony on the house across the street, right? You probably don't remember, but we waived to you and your friend a couple of days ago." I'm partially listening as I try to quickly assess the situation, because I'm analytical like that. Now my mind is drifting because I'm thinking about how any other girl in the house would be eating up this moment, you know, being alone with five good-looking guys all tan and pretty buff would kick in 'flirting' mode. As for me? Well yeah it's nice being the center of attention but I tend to clam up and be reserved, eyeing everyone with a degree of suspicion. A couple of guys are playing it cool, going about their workout routine, trying to remain aloof or maybe they don't care. It doesn't hurt my feelings in the slightest if a guy shows no interest in me, I don't have that swelled of a head. There are actually allot of guys that like very petite girls, or girls that are very thin and feminine, hell some guys like their girl's well- rounded. "That's right..." "We're staying just down the street." Another guy jumps into the conversation. We'll, they were all nice and invited me and my girlfriends down to their house later that night. I said I would mention it because believe it or not I do know how to relax and enjoy myself when on vacation. Besides, giving them the benefit of the doubt it may actually turn out to be a nice time. But enough of that junk, because the rest of my workout was not that good, too many interruptions and distractions. Besides, I was now thinking about Sharon again, those images of what happened last night were coming back around and I needed to hold her and find out if what happened was real. Every ticking second pushed those memories further away and I got panicked. Now I was making my way up the stairs, a bit tired and looking forward to getting some rest. The sun was way up in the sky, 'Must be noon by now' I thought thinking about lunch. "Hey" I said in a soft tone as if my voice had become suddenly weak. Sharon stopped mid stride as I stood hiding in a small alcove that hung off the hallway. "What?" She broke out in that smile that always makes me feel better. I pulled her close and into the corner with me. I wanted to say so many things but just pulled her to me and squeezed Sharon into a tight hug. She hugged me back and I knew it was all real. But I was so tired all I could do was sleep as she poured the light cotton covers over me. ********* Later that night went to one of the local Night Clubs and I think Tina was glad she got the forewarning on my relationship with Sharon, do to the fact that Sharon and I would periodically hold hands or lock arms for most of that night. >>From an outside perspective it was no big deal, but knowing what Tina now knew, that goes for all the girls in the house, seeing this affection took on a whole new meaning for those 'in the know'. It most have been much later in the evening, after Tina had knocked back a few that she pulled me aside to say the to best of her recollection, she had always perceived me to be heterosexual, independent and self-reliant. So watching the way I allowed Sharon to take a dominant role seemed at odds with everything she thought she knew about me. Oh well go figure, I didn't give much of a response, might as well try and explain the meaning of life you know? Who knows why we find certain things comfortable in a relationship or uncomfortable for that matter. I had already put away a couple of mixed drinks and the effect was going right to my head, I even let Sharon drag me onto the dance floor as the two us uninhibitedly moved our bodies together, which actually involved less dancing and more rubbing and grinding, which to my embarrassment drew a number of stairs from many guys. When we finally left the dance floor I was drenched in sweat quickly made my way to the woman's room where I proceeded to grab several paper towels. I took the waded up towels and leaned over, dabbing my calves, working my way up to my inner and outer thighs. It was upon leaving that bathroom that I was suddenly being tugged on the elbow "Corbin?" It was a familiar voice, one I had not heard in a very long time, I turned to a very surreal sight. Taylor from High School was standing there, a beer in her hand her skin tan from the beach, but her trademark hairstyle, cut short and still very curly and red. I just stood open mouthed, eyes staring hard. "It's ME! Taylor." She leaned in. "I remember, yeah. How have you been? It's been a long time" I crumbled up the now wet paper towels and tossed them aside. I then picked up that 'eyeing' action from Taylor, you know, as if I'm being checked out. Well it wasn't my massive intellect that detected this it was the way her eyes kept roaming up and down my body. "Yeah I know, definitely a long time." Taylor said, she had a somewhat serious expression "I'm down here vacationing with a couple of friends. To tell the truth, I wasn't sure about coming up to you and saying hello." "No its okay, you know, that's ancient history." I smiled with a shrugged. I noticed Taylor giving me this gesture to lean in close and I cautiously did, she moved my right ear to speak, "You are looking better then ever, you really must be kicking ass in the gym." And Taylor quickly pulled away, maybe even some signs of being uncomfortable with giving me that compliment. "Thanks Taylor." I just smiled, trying to show no signs of being offended. "By the way, you're looking pretty good yourself." I decided to return the compliment. "Oh thanks, yeah I've gotten a little more trim and fit. Still play sports and yes I'm still gay." She chuckled a little bit. But I think I might have given a little something away in my reaction as Taylor was now studying me so I tried to cover up with a quick, "Fine by me." and smiled. "I saw Sharon with you earlier." "Yep, she's here." I smiled, "I wouldn't worry about all that stuff in High School, I'm pretty sure it's all forgotten about it." I smiled. "Sharon? We're talking about the same Sharon? You're best friend right? I don't think so." Taylor dismissed my suggestion while taking another swig of her beer. I looked down and smiled to myself, "Yeah I guess your right, and Sharon has been known to hold a grudge or two." "Well, you and Sharon looked pretty friendly out there on the dance floor earlier. In fact you two were heating things up out there. I never would have thought Sharon would..." She paused as if searching for a word or two, "...we'll you're so conservative." Taylor gave me a friendly nudge on the bicep with her elbow. "Hey I didn't mean." I picked up some sudden hesitation on Taylor's part, that maybe her observation was out of line, so I decided to cut thru the crap and just spill it. "You might as well know Taylor," I interrupted and looked her in dead in the eyes and watched as the redhead's smile quickly faded. "What?" Taylor asked, standing frozen...waiting. "Sharon and I, well, we're an item. So there, but it's not a secret anymore." At first, I thought she didn't hear a word I said as Taylor stood stone faced, unflinching as if still waiting for me to say something, perhaps a punch line or something. "You know...dating? As in, we are a...couple!" I leaned in a bit as if to punctuate my point. "Oh...uh...I get it Corbin, I just don't believe what I'm hearing. You're saying YOU..." Her left hand came up, slowly pointing at me, then moving off in Sharon's direction, "...and SHARON? You're pulling my fucking leg." She just laughed. But I stood looking intensely serious. "OH MY GOD!" Taylor leaned back on her heels as her eyebrows raised at the implications, her face now turned totally serious. And then Taylor did something that shocked me, she let loose with a verbal tirade, "That fucking hypocrite! All those years she gave me hell for being gay, and now she's involved with a girl! Sorry, sorry Corbin." Taylor suddenly looked down at the ground, I guess realizing she might not want to bad mouth Sharon in front of me, even if she was right. But I let it slide. "So when did you decide you liked women?" Taylor suddenly looked up and asked. "I didn't, I mean..." It took a moment to collect my thoughts because I was buzzed, "...I started falling for Sharon, it's not like I became attracted to girls in general, I don't know." "And Sharon? Was that the same for her, falling for you?" "Yeah, I guess we're what you would call two straight girls that fell in love with one another or something like that?" I smiled a little and shrugged. "Well look, I have to get back to the gang, maybe I'll see you around the beach sometime?" I smiled, stepping away, a clear sign I was ready to part company. "I don't think so, my beach house isn't in the same zip-code as where you guys are probably staying, if you know what I mean." Taylor smirked. For a second, I felt bad for giving Taylor the brush off and turned back around to face her, "Hey, why don't you give me your address, you know, and I'll stop by." Which I can't believe I was saying, but I thought it was a nice gesture at the time. To my surprise she stood standing like a statue staring at me, her eyes blinked a couple of times in disbelief I guess at my offer, but then she quickly accepted. I watched her grab a napkin and pen from the bartender as she jotted down the address and handed it to me. "Here you go, hope you use it." Taylor smiled and took another sip of beer and then I watch as Taylor's entire composure changed, and while I was trying to figure it out, I heard the answer come from behind me... "Well, if it isn't the dyke bitch from High School!" Sharon's voice boomed out and she was now standing next to me. "Take it easy Sharon." I interjected raising my hand reaching out to touch her arm soothingly. "Fuck taking it easy, how in the hell can you tell me to take it easy!" Sharon cast an irritated look at me for a second and then back to Taylor. "Damn Sharon that was way back in High School, you're still upset over that?" Taylor said, staying amazingly calm "Still upset? BINGO! Fuckface!" Sharon stepped in close. Thankfully, one of the bouncers in the club took notice of the raising voices. "You know Sharon, your full of allot of talk when you have your friends watching your back." Taylor sighed. "Just you and me, we can step around back right now, just the two of us." Sharon set her glass down on the nearby bar to show she meant business. I felt my heart start thumping in my chest and I got that nervous tremble going on, I was a little pissed Tina was not offering up any calming words here. "Just you and me huh?" Taylor seemed to think it over, while I was getting this tongue tied anxiety attack, I look over at Tina who seems to be enjoying the whole spectacle and was showing no intentions of interfering, 'This is bullshit!' I thought. "Hey you two..." I started in. "Everything okay?" The man's voice came from behind, a rather large fellow wearing a black t-shirt with the clubs name on it stepped into the fray. "Yeah, everything's fine, we're just talking." I said. "Just keep it that way." He continued to eye us suspiciously and slowly turned to walk away. Sharon also watched the bouncer walk away and she turned back towards Taylor, her head coming about in a slow, purposeful manner. "Well bitch?" Her voice low. "You want your payback you snot nose bitch?" Taylor's anger started to boil over. "You bet I do." "Remember, she started it Corbin!" Taylor pointed at Sharon, looking somewhat distraught as if I might interfere. "That's right." Sharon fumed. "Damn Sharon enough!" I was now seething. "Okay STOP! You hear me!" I stepped in the middle of them facing Sharon, I wasn't going to let her get into a fight. "Dammit, move Corbin!" Sharon growled. "No." I gave a quick glance over my shoulder to Taylor, "Maybe it's best you head on okay?" I tried to bargain with her. "Another time Princess." Taylor smiled as she backed away. "Count on it!" Sharon retaliated with an eat shit look. Quickly she turned, now back in my face, "What the hell do you think you were doing?" Sharon demanded. "Trying to keep you from getting into a fight." I said with a sincere look. "I can take care of myself." Sharon's face red and emotional, "I'm not some little baby that needs protecting." My right hand gripped Sharon's left arm right above her elbow, giving a gentle squeeze. "I know you can take care of yourself Sharon. And I know how it upsets you to see Taylor again, I was there remember." I leaned in a bit. "I just got so angry when I saw her, I just couldn't help it. I guess I should let it go its ancient history, no big deal now. You paid her back for me anyway." Sharon huffed emotionally, her left hand came up and gripped my right elbow in return. "Come' on." I pulled her close and smiled. Sharon's face flushed a brighter shade of red as she glanced over at Tina who was watching intently, then looked back at me and we seemed to forget where we were and hugged one another. I blushed this time as Sharon looked over her shoulder to Tina, "Sorry, excuse us for second."